What Women Really Want in Bed - Book launch today!

The day we've been waiting for has FINALLY arrived. Today's the day that men everywhere will stop wondering "What does my woman really want in bed?" (Well, we hope today's the day, anyway). We're happy to announce the official launch of the book What Women Really Want in Bed: The Surprising Secrets Women Wish Men Knew About Sex, which I wrote with co-author and childhood friend Dana Fredsti.

You can buy your copy online now through our site. Or buy it for your man and stop hoping he will read your mind or ask for directions in bed--he won't, without this book! That's our story and we're sticking to it.

We've launched a Twitter page and hope you'll follow our many tweets from the book at http://www.twitter.com/womenwantinbed -- please follow us and say hi!

We also have a Facebook Fan Page: http://www.facebook.com/pages/What-Women-Really-Want-In-Bed-The-Surprising-Secrets-Women-Wish-Men-Knew/359139043886
Please become a fan and share us with your friends!

Thanks to everyone how participated in the survey for this book and shared their candid responses with us. We couldn't have written it without you. Thanks also for your support of the book and for passing the word along to your girlfriends, boyfriends, husbands, lovers and fans!

Sex News Roundup - Week of June 29, 2009

It's time to launch a new feature on The Mind Reels.

Every week*, I'll give you a roundup of notable--or notably wacky--news about all things sex-related. (I thought of starting a Worst Parent of the Week feature, but realized I'd get too depressed.) Now, normally I'd start a feature such as this on a Saturday, so I could use the "for the week ending July 4, 2009" designation, but today's news offered me two nuggets I couldn't pass up.

This Recession is So Bad that not Even Sex Sells.
That's the depressing headline on an article in this morning's San Jose Mercury News Business section, which reported on the annual Cybernet Expo conference in San Francisco. I'm not sure what was more interesting to me: the fact that times are tough in the "pay-per-view" sex industry, or that this conference didn't sound that much different from your average high-tech event, down to the breakout sessions on social media and the late-afternoon cocktails.

Man Demands Sex in Exchange for Lost Dog.
A convicted sex offender in the Los Angeles area demanded that a teenager give him cash or sex in exchange for the return of her lost dog Pineapple, a cocker-spaniel-toy poodle mix. And yet he's only been charged with "attempted extortion." Whaaaaa????

Got a good sex news tidbit for me? Send it on. Oh, and many thanks to Great White Snark, for giving me the idea for this feature.

* Note: "Every week" should be roughly translated as "hopefully every month" or "whenever I feel like it."

Porn industry asks feds for money.

It was inevitable.

In light of the economic meltdown, the porn industry (well, as represented by Larry Flynt and Girls Gone Wild CEO Joe Francis) is seeking a federal bailout.

Flynt said in a statement: "People are too depressed to be sexually active. This is very unhealthy as a nation. Americans can do without cars and such but they cannot do without sex."

You know, he has a point. This man might be a real patriot.

Really, though, if the porn industry can get government help, can erotica writers and sex book authors be far behind? The value of my 401K has halved, my husband has been out of work for months, and we have a college education to pay for. Paul Greenberg made a compelling argument in the New York Times recently for writers getting a bailout.

Look at it this way. If the porn industry needs a bailout, and writers need a bailout, then sex writers really need a bailout. I'm just saying.

BlogHer '08: Fivestar interviews me at the Sex & Relationships Birds of a Feather Meet-Up.

One of the sessions I enjoyed most at BlogHer '08 was the Sex & Relationships Birds of a Feather Meet-Up on Friday. (Details later, in a subsequent blog post. Yeah, I'm a tease. Sorry.)

Afterwards, video artist Fivestar interviewed me for a video, "The Quick and Dirty BlogHer '08 Sex Video," for her blog, iamFivestar. We talked about how I got started writing about sex (accidentally), how the Internet has changed sex (more choices for women), and a bunch of other stuff.

Fivestar's friendliness and warmth made it a really fun interview. I'd talk to her about sex any time!

Violet Blue on "feminist porn."

Violet Blue has a thought-provoking column on "feminist porn" on SFGate.com today. Read it here.

I'd write more about it but I'm tired and on deadline (translation: in slideware hell) for my day job.

I gotta say, I love the idea that someone is making great porn for women (that isn't all soft-core and lame), because most of the videos out there are pretty ridiculous. To each his or her own, of course, especially when it comes to erotica.

Erotica: a definition.

The scene: a dinner party with lots of free alcohol. The situation: someone has just found out that I'm a sex writer. The question, usually asked with a smirk: "So, what's the difference between 'erotica' and 'pornography'?" My response: (Insert stammering and blathering about 'literature' and 'aesthetics.')

My friend Tim, of Planet Timbotron and Letters from Estonia fame, has come to my rescue with this definition:

Erotica: hinting about a lady and a donkey.
Porn: showing a lady and a donkey doing it.

Tim didn't get a Ph.D. from Stanford for nothing. Thanks, buddy. I owe you one.